voting against gay marriage is like ordering a piece of cake at a restaurant and having a complete stranger be like “waiter, cancel that cake”
"waiter cancel that cake it’s ruining my cake and i don’t know how to explain it to my children"
"my dietbook said I can’t have cake so throw that guy’s cake away too."
|me:||I'm so triggered, i'm going to fast for a year and be thin and beautiful.|
|10 minutes later:||*eats a 12inch pizza, chips, cakes, chocolate, popcorn, a fully grown human*|
Please don’t leave me alone with my thoughts I can feel them taking over me :/
today in class this guy stole my paper and i just randomly shouted “I WILL EAT YOUR CHILDREN” and he said “Do they have to be born?” and i just sat down because that was a hella good comeback
WHY ARE YOU GUYS NOT SCREAMING I TRIED TO THREATEN THIS GUY AND HE TURNED IT INTO A BLOW JOB REFERENCE YOU GUYS BETTER BE FUCKING LAUGHINGUm, we were. It was a great cumback
OH. MY. GOD. I SNORTED